May 3, 2024 “What are you projecting?”
I want to thank you for continuing to read our weekly newsletters. I hope that you find them interesting and informative.
As loyal and avid readers of Tadda’s Fitness Center’s newsletter, whether you got here through joining camp, being forwarded our newsletter, or stumbling across it on your fitness journey, you are family. And this week I would like to invite you to join our challenge whether you are a current member of TFC or not!
The challenge is to look at yourself naked in the mirror for at least 1 full minute. When you’re having fun 1 minute seems to fly by but when I ask for 1 minute of burpees it seems as if it takes a lifetime.
So, look at yourself naked for one minute. Turn around, lift your arms, lift a leg, check out your butt. Can you see your feet? I love when “Shea Butter” first joined TFC and I asked her what her goals were and she said to be able to see her “girl” down below again. I’m proud to say she accomplished her goal! LOL
Now ask yourself these few questions:
-How do I feel looking at my body?
-What am I most proud of looking at my body?
-What did I inherit from my family’s DNA?
-What do I want to change?
-How do I present myself to the world?
The first and last questions are the most important because they tell me how you present yourself to the world and how the world treats you back.
I just recently took a trip to Tulum and after a day at the beach I had to go to the bathroom, which I thought was so chic. There is something about bathroom mirrors and lighting that seems to bring out the best of our features, just look at social media, a lot of content creators’ film in bathrooms. Well, on this day I could already tell I had a significant tan, my skin was glowing, and you couldn’t tell me I was not on that stuff, so I started to film myself. I know I was there much longer than 1 minute. I adjusted my swimsuit so I could see my waistline better, I turned and twisted my body so I could see other angles, muscles, and scars. I even embraced my imperfections and I said, “Tadda you’re a bad 53-year-old”.
People may look at me and see an amazing body, but no matter how remarkable your body is if you look long enough you will find flaws and defects. Some will walk away grateful because they know what their body has been through; for me I have my multiple surgeries, but I also saw all of the hard work and dedication I put into my getting the body I have now.
Let me tell you the flip side to this. I didn’t always feel this way. I was extremely underdeveloped, hated my butt with a passion and didn’t like how skinny I was. Basically, I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror. The image we see in the mirror may be a real or distorted view of who we really are, however based on this view, we develop either a positive or negative self-image. With a positive self-image, we recognize and own our assets and potentials while being realistic about our liabilities and limitations. With a negative self-image, we focus on our faults and weaknesses, distorting failure, and imperfections. I presented this negative self-image to the world and the world picked up on my low self-esteem. The opinions of others had power over how I felt about myself. I required excessive reassurance from others. When I was younger and didn’t know my worth, I would jump at any guy that gave me a compliment. I constantly sought praises and validation to feel good about myself.
When you have poor self-worth, relying too much on what others think of you and a negative self-image with a distorted perception of how you perceive yourself, you define how people see and treat you. You magnify your flaws and imperfections while ignoring your good qualities. You compare yourself unfavorably to others and adopt an “I’m not good enough” mindset.
The good news is that you can overcome a negative self-image. Start by identifying the root causes of your self-dislike and how it impacts you now. Start with 1 minute in the mirror and love everything you see in that 1 minute regardless of how you previously thought about your body.
When you walk away from the mirror, challenge negative thoughts that may still be floating in your head and replace them with more balanced ones. Practice self-care, pursue hobbies, and engage in regular exercise. Spend less time comparing yourself to others on social media. Learn to accept yourself flaws and all. Appreciate your good qualities and accomplishments, however small. With time and effort, you can develop a healthier and more compassionate view of yourself. So now I am at the point of loving those same areas, I used to dislike, my butt and all, but also loving the whole me and knowing my worth.
Now I present myself to the world as confident, strong, beautiful, age defying, amazing, healthy, sexy, hot … and the list goes on. How do I know this is what I am projecting? Because these are adjectives that people have used to describe me, this is how I am being seen. I am a reflection of the true person I see in the mirror, someone that is a bad 53-year-old flaws and all.
If you just look, the mirror can reflect a truer image of who you are a complex, multi-faceted, and inherently worthwhile person. You just have to wipe away the grime of past distortions and see yourself again. In the end, YOU define your self-worth, not your flaws, your past, or the opinions of others. You are enough, just as you are. No Mess!
